Random Funny Things Online

[Angel of Agni]

This can be stuff such as flash vids, quotes, fics, pics, anything. Nothing adult unless you give a warning. Inapropriate materiel without a warning will be deleted.

Here's mine, a quote I found in a sig a while ago, but first, recall Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, where Romeo sees her at her balcony, and diclaims, "But soft! What yonder light through window breaks!?"
Now, the quote: "Shakespeare was amazing. Who else could take words and create phrases like, 'but soft, what yonder light broke my window.'" -Mel Brooks

[terra]

ROFL!! that is histerical!

[Angel of Agni]

Lookit this! (and see if you can get the joke!)

98% of all teenagers are bad at math. If you're one of the 5% who are good at it, paste this into your signature.

[terra]

ROFL!! That is HISTERICAL!!

[Angel of Agni]

Here's another!

15 Things to do at Wal-Mart when your going to be in there for a long time:

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares.... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

Hmm...I would do...1, 2, 4, 9, 10, 11, and 15. XD

[terra]

Those are SOO awful.. Lol.. that is awesome!

[Angel of Agni]

Definity! I don't have any more, but I'll keep looking...
Wait! Here's one:
Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree?
Because he was dead.
Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
Because he was dead.
Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
Peer Pressure!

LOL!

And one more:
60 Ways to Annoy Slade (as his apprentice)

1) Ask him, "Where's the Slade mobile?"
2) Ask, "Why don't you hang out with people your own age?"
3) Show him the End of "Apprentice" part II. Offer constructive criticism. Tell him we all make mistakes.
4) Sue him for impersonating Darth Vader
5) Create a tabloid based on his "secret relationships" with his apprentices
6) There's always squirting water on the seat of his pants when he comes out of the bathroom.
7) Every time he gets a new apprentice, study them thoroughly then turn to Slade, wink, and say "I'll leave you kids alone."
8) Ask him to tell you about his social life. When he mentions his old wife and his kids, stop him mid-sentence and say, "Wait a minute, Wait a minute! You were married?!?! Seriously?!"
9) After he finishes explaining one of his plans to you say, "Uh... What?" or "I don't get it."
10) Sometime in between his long evil speech, say "Does this plan include the teddy bear you left on your bed last night?"
11) Show him fanfiction.net. Proudly show him the fanfic you wrote featuring a Slade/Robin pairing. Include illustrations.
12) Give him a Gap Gift Certificate for his birthday
13) Wake him up at the middle of night and complain that you need to go potty or you miss your mommy or insist there are monsters in your closet.
14) Tell him that team rocket called about a job interview.
15) You can also tell him that Robin is a Teletubbie in disguise...
16) Ask "So that little Titan outfit of Terra's...was it her idea, or yours?"
17) Also ask "Does it ever get hot under there? What happens if your nose itches?"
18) Ask him to tape your favorite Teen Titans episodes while you're away.
19) Put a parental control lock on his world domination files.
20) ) Ask if his underwear is metal since everything else he wears is.
21) Shoot him with a SuperSoaker.
22) Ask him repeatedly what the number for 9-1-1 is.
23) Use his computer, and then drain his ink cartridges by printing out tons of creepy Slade/Robin fan-fiction. Ask him to please read through said fan-fiction and check for accuracy.
24) Install Windows98 on his computer. Run like hell and wait for the explosion.
25) Carefully steal Slade's wallet. Then order 3000 Pizza's to his hideout, not only will he be annoyed by the fact someone ordered something he didn't ask for, He won't be able to find his wallet if they force him to pay for it.
26) Mess with the water pressure while he's taking a shower.
27) Tell him he can't carry out any of his evil plans because they're illegal.
28) Say "Trigon wrote 'Kick me' on your back again. Here, turn around and I'll get it off. Oh, you know what, he wrote in permanent silver sharpie. I hope this wasn't your favorite suit."
29) Replace his staff with Wonka Nerdz Rope and spray paint it silver.
30) Tuck a huge condom into the back of his belt when he's not looking, so it flops around like a tail when he walks.
31) Call him Skeletor.
32) Put a big flashy Neon sign outside the lair that says: SLADE'S LAIR ENTER HERE ========>
33) Plant a stink bomb in the lair, when it goes off say: “Whew! Slade did you have to?!”
34) Run around him in circles, singing that "Barbie Girl" song at the top of your lungs.
35) Make him try out for your school's musical.
36) Film a Documentary on Slade; refer to him as "the Rare and Exotic Supervillan." set the Documentary up Crocodile Hunter Style.
37) Put a "Keep away from children" sign on him.
38) When he's revealing his evil plans to the Titans, say you taught him everything he knew.
39) Burp the Teen Titans theme song, and then ask if he can do anything that cool.
40) Tell him "I've heard eviler plans from my bunny slippers."
41) Make him complete the entire "Fun Things to do in WalMart" list, and then contact the Titans, saying he's robbing the store.
42) If he complements your evilness (or calls you an not a very nice person), say "Doumo Arigatou Mr. Robotto"
43) Make him watch Sailor Moon and Fruits Basket with you. Put it in Japanese with no subtitles.
44) Say you're gonna get him a new mode of transportation, so cool it would demand respect. Then go hotwire a school bus and spray-paint "Slademobile" on it. Put a tracking device in it so the Titans can find it.
45) Beg him to watch TV with you and cry during dog food commercials and call him an insensitive jerk for not.
46) Sit at the table across from him and blink repeatedly…or don’t blink at all
47) Play pin the tail on the donkey with him. Keep "accidentally" putting the pin on him. Ask him what the difference is.
48) Berate the Teen Titans (and anyone he fought (and lost to)) for beating up a cripple.
49) Ask how he can breathe in that Mask if he didn't put in any nose holes.
50) Replace his tooth paste with athlete’s foot cream.
51) Ask him if he has ever come up with a plan that worked.
52) Order 20 subscriptions to "Teen Titans GO!" and have them all sent to Slade.
53) Call him weak because this show is rated Y-7.
54) Look up the most obscure holidays and force Slade to celebrate them with you. Days like "Mother-in-law day" or "Talk like a pirate day" or "Be kind to cows week".
55) Buy him a "Baby on board" Sticker for the Slade-mobile.
56) Act paranoid. If Slade asks why or tells you to stop, say "We're being watched. Right now, millions of people all around the globe are watching our every move!" feel free to scream at the end of that statement.
57) Lock him out of his lair, and when he rings the doorbell asking you to unlock the door tell him that Slade told you not to let anyone in.
58) 23. Post Slade’s next evil plan on the internet.
59) Write a book entitled: The Stupid Things that Slade does and "accidentally" leave the manuscript on his desk were he can see it.
60) Fill his control room with helium so that when he talks on the main computer thing to the teen titans, his voice is all squeaky.

-----These are all curtasy of the Titansgo.net forum, where you can find the full list.

[terra]

Rofl!!!! AWESOME!!! I love the "Barbie Girl" one!!!

*runs around in circles*

I'M A BARBIE GIRL, IN A BARBIE WOOOOORLD! LIFE'S FANTASTIC, MADE OF PLASTIC, YOU CAN FIX MY HAIR, TAKE ME ANYWAAAAAAAAAAARE. iT'S MY NATION, YOUR IMAGINATIOON!!!

ROFL!!